Lochie lives on in more hearts than ours.

This is not really my story to write, it was not my child, but I loved him immensely when he was here and I miss him painfully now he isn't. I recently did a brief post for a friend looking for people for some organ transplant research, I was just helping out another Mumprener with her business.

But it got me thinking about organ donations again.

About Lochie.

About the people who now live thanks to receiving his gifts.

They were Lochie's gifts, but more so they were gifts from his parents. Parents who woke one Easter Tuesday morning and started the day like normal, with three healthy children and after unfortunate and extraordinary circumstances would have to kiss their son goodbye for the last time. At the same time they made the extremely unselfish decision to donate his organs.

At least seven other children now live thanks to this decision.

Lochie was three years and eight months old when he died in Intensive Care at Royal Children's Hospital.

Organ receipients don't know my sister and her family. They know they received organs from a male child from Victoria, aged three.

They have the option to write letters to the donor family through the organ donor organisation. The letters go through the agency to keep the privacy of each family, as they should.

Initially there were a couple of letters to say thanks, and a few lines about the child and how their health had improved.

Then they stopped.

And this is where I have an issue. Why did they stop? Do the families of those who are now alive forget about the decision that was made so courageously by Lochie's parents?

Do they worry what to say, or that their words may be upsetting? Have they just moved on with their now healthy lives?

Because we still have a missing piece. We celebrate a childs birthday with the birthday boy not there. We send balloons to heaven and think about what he might have liked for Christmas this year, would he still believe in Santa? What would he have been like at school? We wish he could have made it to his first day of kinder that he was so looking forward to.

Sending a card just once a year to say;

"We hope you are well and we continue as always to thank you for the decision you made, which changed our lives and gave our child and us, so much."

Best wishes,

Recipient

Is this too much to ask?

Don't think for one moment Lochie's parents would ever expect this, but this is what makes me even angrier, they did so much for others and expect nothing, zip, nadda in return, they even make excuses for people that never ever said thank you.

I am not so forgiving.

I want the world to praise them, (and any other parent who makes this decision) out loud, to say, we remember what you did and your child. We celebrate that your child still lives on in us.

I want them to add their organ donor to their Christmas card list, to say thank you every year, you made the right decision, you really gave the ungiveable, the gift of life.

And if they find that hard to do, then shame on them. Hard is a small white coffin lowered into the ground with your child inside it.

What I really really want right now is to be wrapping a present to put under my tree, with a gift card that says "Lochie".

I can't, but if anyone in your family, or even a good friend is the lucky receiver of an organ, maybe you could put pen to paper this Christmas and remind the donor family they are fabulous people, and you do remember them from time to time.






Post Script
Added Tues30 November
Lochie's family write a response.