How to help when you don't know how to help. #6Letters

Sometimes when there are people you know who are having a shit time it can be really hard to know what to do to help.

There are the little things such as taking a meal or food, providing funds if you can or if they are needed, helping around the house and just being a good person and friend.

There is also the option of just sending a little card in the mail. A note that says nothing more then "I am thinking of you, and I hope things get better for you soon."

Often we get stuck trying to work out what to write in those cards. Well I do. I can get really caught up in how important my words need to be. It's as though my words will be the make or break point of a day. I can feel as though the right words, cleverly crafted into something inspiring and hopeful will be the cure required. Well, the truth is, my words are not a magical cure to a shit situation.

Instead, my words can fill a  very brief moment. They can be a simple reminder that my friend is not alone, even though they may feel that way. A card with your simple words can be a break in a hectic day. A break that was badly needed and might not have otherwise occurred.

I love to send cards and letters to people and also love to receive them, and if the card has arrived for no real reason, then it is even betterer and gooder then anything.

Thinking about this is a  reminder to me that it has been AGES since I did my #6letters. A project I used to share with you about sending a letter a week for six weeks, or 6 letters out in a week, or  2 letters for 3 weeks...whatever you want to do. There are no real rules, it's just a little challenge to send six handwritten notes in the mail.

Handwritten things are extra special because the receiver knows how much extra effort you have made. You have organised a card and a stamp and gone to a post box and considered your words. You have really had that person in your thoughts for more then a 'virtual hug'* on facebook.

There is nothing bad about a handwritten card.

I am going to be sending out six in the next few weeks.

If you'd like to consider doing the same, here are my top three tips.

1) Buy al the cards, or note paper, or use the pack of your kids artwork and have it ready to go.
2) Buy all the stamps at one time.
3) Don't overthink what you are going to write, it doesn't have to be an essay.


Go write, scribble, draw, doodle and send it in the post.

A letter: Dear Grammar Police

Dear Grammar Police

You know who you are, you are the people that think because you have a good grasp on where an apostrophe goes and never ever use the incorrect version of your or there that you have the right to let everyone else know about it.

You correct facebook updates and tweets, leave comments to just ‘let someone know of their error’ so that you can save the world of incorrect grammar and spelling usage.

Please stop it.

Some people have other talents other than writing. Some people have not received the education standards you did. There are some people who have this thing called a learning disability, they struggle their entire lives to get the words correct and go to great lengths to hide their disability from people like you. They should be free to communicate without the fear of correction. When you kindly remind someone of where to place an apostrophe you are only belittling him or her, usually publicly. It is not your duty to correct, save it for those who ask for assistance, I promise you there are thousands of us out there happy to ask when we need help.

Do you speak multiple languages? Imagine if you did and sometimes you mixed up the rules for different languages. I know I would rather have the linguistic skills of these people than the grammar skills you so highly regard.  

Some people can whip up a fabulous meal or they might be crafty, they might just be the most excellent friend you could ever want. Does it matter that much to you if their written english is lacking?

Personally, I have lazy writing skills, I often have errors, some are typos and some are from poor (or non existent) proof reading.  I also mispronounce the spoken word quite often. I hear and dislike the incorrect use of many words I don’t feel the need to jump up and tell people how to speak.

Take a break grammar police. If you understand the concept of what the person has written and they are not asking for someone to review their writing then let it go.

Lastly, words and grammar evolve naturally over time so while (whilst) you think that rule is not flexible, sometimes it is. And (never start a sentence with and apparently) words and language will continue to change whether you keep up or not.

Kind regards

Clairey Hewitt, self confessed over user of exclamation marks and often incorrect user of apostrophes. 

P.S.  Feel free to correct my errors if it makes you feel better.

Pinning and Penning

This Image is stolen from Becky off Instagram - Check out how she is going at BeckyandJames.com

Six letters in six weeks...harder than you thought? Or easy?



I know some people haven't started, others got a head start with three in the first week and some are just doing the one per week.

However you are writing I hope that you are actually enjoying it. This is not meant to be a difficult challenge.

There were some lovely images coming through on twitter, facebook and instagram so I have also started a Pinterest Board for the lovely images too, as in really just started and I was hoping to try and find the images, but if you have some of your own send them to me and I shall get them up on the board - or Pin them yourself!

If you are writing to a mother figure in your life though, probably best to get that in the mail asap.

Happy Writing.

The App I Like.

No shopping list or piece of paper is safe in our house these days. As Popps learns to write a new letter each week in the class room she is also changing her writing style and playing with the way her letters look. It is important to her to get the letters correct and to look like the teacher wants them to look and she practices on anything that doesn't move. And sometimes on things that do (it was only chalk, dogs don't mind having their names written on them).

I stumbled across the rED Writing App and it has saved a handful of work documents from being drawn on. Not many, but it's a start.

Popps loves this app and it could be one of my most favourite ones ever for purpose and entertainment. I also showed it to her Prep teacher who was mighty impressed, in fact she is getting ipads for their class room and wanted to know if this app could be used on iPads too - which it is, but only the phone version not a special ipad version.

Popps is also constantly asking us to write out notes, words and stories for her and it has helped that we know how she is meant to learn the letters, Mr H can barely read his own writing so I am going to suggest he starts playing red writing too. I tend to do my r in an old fashioned way so I am trying to write it 'correctly' for her.

Immy so far is interested in only the letter I and the number 3, because they are hers, and no one else anywhere is allowed to have them.

This is not a review, just sharing an app that I think is actually worth downloading.

From the app site is this: Teach children ages 3 - 7 how to write the letters and numbers of the alphabet the same way they are taught at school. Co-designed by an Australian teacher for children aged 3-7 years old, rED Writing contains 8 x education approved handwriting fonts used throughout Australian schools (QLD, NSW, ACT, VIC, TAS, SA, WA and NT) to trace and learn.

Have you got any favourite apps? Share them here so I can update my gadgets.

If you are playing along, how are you going with your #6Letters?

I am doing a handwriting challenge, come and join me too.

If I could hand write this post straight to the interwebs I would, but I have no idea how to do that.

Instead you will all have to do the writing yourself.

If you want.

It's time for a mini handwriting challenge.

I have been thinking about doing this since Eden mentioned handwriting. I have been making more effort to ensure I send the odd letter, note or card to people.

I also received the most surprising and lovely card in the mail last week. It made me cry. It could not have had the same effect if it was typed, texted, facebooked or even emailed to me.

Mail, actually written by you has a secret power that you never even realise. Only the receiver gets the magic. That extra smile you have when you get a surprise letter, the joy of hearing from someone real, of learning some news, of knowing someone far away was thinking about them.

I know lots of you might be thinking the following things:

- I have no one to write to
- I don't have any nice cards or paper
- I have no news to tell
- my handwriting is too messy, my spelling too poor

And I am telling you these are just excuses.

Write to your family members, an old friend or a friend you see every week. Write to your kids and put the letter in your drawer until they are 21. Write to your husband and put the letter in his wallet to read at work. Write to your grandma, even if you never have, especially if you never have. Send birthday cards to old friends that you have not sent to in some time. Send a thank you letter to your favourite shop or cafe, tell them why you love their service, often it is the complaints that come in first.

Cards and fancy paper are limiting, they reduce the space you have to write on, use printer paper, folder paper or a note pad. Use the back of your kid's artwork, recycle some junk mail. Send one sentence on a sticky note or copy an old photo of you and a friend and add a note on the back.

You always have something to say.

Your handwriting is perfectly fine. The beauty of handwriting is that it is all you, it is not meant to be perfect, straight and planned, it is fluid, wobbly, personal and flows out on the page.

So here is my challenge for myself and if you want to join along just let me know.

I will add a special side bar in my blog that includes everyone who is taking part, Bloggers or not.


It is really very simple, the challenge is just

Six letters to six people in six weeks.

That is just a letter a week for six weeks.

It can be harder than it sounds though so let me give you the tips to help make sure this happens.

Get your envelopes and your stamps ready at the beginning. Choose your paper of choice or buy a collection of cards if you think you want to send cards. Having to get to a post office six times is annoying so get all you need on one trip and just pop things in the closest mail box.

Keep a pen handy in case you get a spare moment to write to someone.

Try and decide at the beginning who you will write to, write them on a list and tick them off as you go.

And lastly, let me know if you blog any thing about your handwriting. I have a button over there on the side bar that you can use on your blog sidebar, or your posts or wherever you use such things.

If twitter is your thing, I will be using the hashtag #6letters

And I will be using the handwriting challenge as an excuse to write about all sorts of things related to handwriting from time to time during the six weeks, which might also be a reminder for you to get writing.

I hope someone feels like joining me, but either way, I will enjoy writing and sending my letters and hope six people have an extra skip in their step as they walk away from the letterbox knowing they have a real letter and not just bills to read for the day.

Happy writing.




And a huge thank you to Liz at Mumstrosity for making the button. Lady is a genius of late night blogging magic.

My Exclamation.

Image from Pinterest

I know I do it.

It is a really bad habit and sometimes I go back and remove them or try and see if something can be altered to give the words the same effect.

But I love them.

One little sign that gives punch and humour and fun and power.

I overuse exclamation marks all the time.

But I am not really sorry.

I know I will continue to overuse them. But let it be known, I know that I do. I just can't help it. It is like a nail biting or smoking habit, one you know you should give up, but they just give you too much joy.

So my exclamation marks are here to stay!

But I don't do double exclamation marks, that is just wrong.

Is that okay?

Rude emails - do you write them?

Emails are one of those things that sometimes just come across all wrong.

When I started work with my first law firm I was petrified of meeting some of the lawyers after I got emails from them.

At the time I was writing away with manners and kindness, as was the norm at my previous job where people made extra effort in any communication.

I was sending emails like this:

Dear Jane
I would love to arrange a time to meet with you to discuss how I can assist you with blah blah. I understand you are extremely busy with whodunit and was wondering if perhaps Tuesday would suit when your diary indicates you are free.
Kind regards
Claire

I would receive an email like this:

Yes.

No hello, no regards. I thought they were all rather rude and scary.

Eight years later and my emails would now be like this:

Jane,
Please let me know when you are free to discuss blah blah,
Regards
Claire

If I am on my phone and sending the email it would be:

let me now (sic) when your (sic) free

Which is really bad, because the person receiving it is probably still at their desk, reading normal emails on a big screen and getting my rude emails. Which of course I don't mean to be rude, but typing with one hand and trying to multitask means somethings gotta give, and sometimes it's email etiquette.

I have started wondering if I just fell into the email culture of the firm and expected the world to follow, but maybe they haven't. Maybe they see my emails as poor form.

So tell me, where is the world at with emails? Should we be making more effort, or should I be? Do you find abrupt emails rude?



Image from Pinterest

Me and handwriting, we are getting back together again.

Way back when I first started blogging, I was also still talking about how much I love handwriting, and especially handwritten mail.

I was reminded of it today when I read that Eden is doing a blog linky about handwriting. I love it of course and I am clicking around and checking out people's handwriting.

It doesn't have to be perfect, or neat even. Handwriting is just such a distinctive thing, I once chatted with a lady that analysed handwriting, she had worked for the federal police for over forty years. In hindsight, that would be the best job ever for me, just learning, studying, talking and reviewing handwriting.

Down below was my original post about handwriting.

I am going to start up again and send a letter or a card to a friend every week for the next six weeks.

Because I really still believe that Handwriting is the new black.

And for to be part of Eden's linky, here is my handwriting.


































Post from the Past
Originally posted 18 August 2010

Everything comes typed these days, and its really getting a bit boring.

Time to get back to basics, originality, and character. Back to handwriting.

I love receiving something from a friend in the mail, but it hardly ever happens these days. I have a beautiful old hat box that I have filled with letters, cards, home made tapes(!) and notes from friends. They start from when I was about 10 and finish sometime in my mid 20s.

Recently, out of the blue I sent my good friend MissMeg a card, just to say hi. She loved it, I loved that she loved it.

So here is my new challenge:

Every week for the next six weeks I will be handwriting a letter or card and posting (remember that) the letter to someone fabulous.

If you feel up to the challenge, join in and let me know how you go.

Beautiful stationery may be desired, but not required, but it might be time to give my fancy pants pen a whirl.

Fancy Pants Pen, time for some action

I have had this ink pot for about 15 years, Mum found it somewhere, no idea how old it is, but I love to use it.

Time to get writing again.

Lochie lives on in more hearts than ours.

This is not really my story to write, it was not my child, but I loved him immensely when he was here and I miss him painfully now he isn't. I recently did a brief post for a friend looking for people for some organ transplant research, I was just helping out another Mumprener with her business.

But it got me thinking about organ donations again.

About Lochie.

About the people who now live thanks to receiving his gifts.

They were Lochie's gifts, but more so they were gifts from his parents. Parents who woke one Easter Tuesday morning and started the day like normal, with three healthy children and after unfortunate and extraordinary circumstances would have to kiss their son goodbye for the last time. At the same time they made the extremely unselfish decision to donate his organs.

At least seven other children now live thanks to this decision.

Lochie was three years and eight months old when he died in Intensive Care at Royal Children's Hospital.

Organ receipients don't know my sister and her family. They know they received organs from a male child from Victoria, aged three.

They have the option to write letters to the donor family through the organ donor organisation. The letters go through the agency to keep the privacy of each family, as they should.

Initially there were a couple of letters to say thanks, and a few lines about the child and how their health had improved.

Then they stopped.

And this is where I have an issue. Why did they stop? Do the families of those who are now alive forget about the decision that was made so courageously by Lochie's parents?

Do they worry what to say, or that their words may be upsetting? Have they just moved on with their now healthy lives?

Because we still have a missing piece. We celebrate a childs birthday with the birthday boy not there. We send balloons to heaven and think about what he might have liked for Christmas this year, would he still believe in Santa? What would he have been like at school? We wish he could have made it to his first day of kinder that he was so looking forward to.

Sending a card just once a year to say;

"We hope you are well and we continue as always to thank you for the decision you made, which changed our lives and gave our child and us, so much."

Best wishes,

Recipient

Is this too much to ask?

Don't think for one moment Lochie's parents would ever expect this, but this is what makes me even angrier, they did so much for others and expect nothing, zip, nadda in return, they even make excuses for people that never ever said thank you.

I am not so forgiving.

I want the world to praise them, (and any other parent who makes this decision) out loud, to say, we remember what you did and your child. We celebrate that your child still lives on in us.

I want them to add their organ donor to their Christmas card list, to say thank you every year, you made the right decision, you really gave the ungiveable, the gift of life.

And if they find that hard to do, then shame on them. Hard is a small white coffin lowered into the ground with your child inside it.

What I really really want right now is to be wrapping a present to put under my tree, with a gift card that says "Lochie".

I can't, but if anyone in your family, or even a good friend is the lucky receiver of an organ, maybe you could put pen to paper this Christmas and remind the donor family they are fabulous people, and you do remember them from time to time.






Post Script
Added Tues30 November
Lochie's family write a response.

These are a few of my favourite things...

Photography - done by other people

Handwriting

Christmas - what is not to like!

Join all this together and with the help of my new friend Karen who did the photos for my blog and the super photos of the girls and I have the best Christmas cards ever.

Yep, I sent Karen a few photos from the BabbleOn house photo ablum of 2010. As we subscribe to the shoot and run photography style most of our photos are blurred, red eyed, one person not looking, bad lighting, eyes closed.

But with her super skills Karen turned our shockers into this:

and also this:

I am printing them out at the local photo shop and can then get busy handwriting some personalised cards to all of our family and friends (sorry for those of you who now know what to expect!)

So, do you wanna get some of these done for yourself? It is all so easy.

And Karen has sent me a special note:

As a special for your blog followers - I will edit and create a personalised Christmas card for AU$15.



To order just go to -- www.studiokas.com.au and click 'view your photos'. The password and discount code for is babbleon (case sensitive). Then just select your preferred template and make payment.

Instructions on emailing photographs will then be supplied to you.


The fine print: the price includes, professional editing of 3 photographs (lighting, tone, basic touch up of images & converting to black and white), adding a personal message to the card, the supply of a high resolution jpeg image for printing.


So, off you go, search through your phone and digital cards for those images that are semi good but not great and turn them into a Christmas Card for everyone to share.

Taste the back of a stamp again...you know you want to.

Since I first decided to go with 'Handwriting is the new black' I continue to get comments on the post, emails to my inbox and tweets on my twitter that new people would love to join in.

My original little challenge to myself to send out some letters to people is over. I did well, sent out a range of things, cards, letters, postcards, Flat Stanley. I even received some letters in return which was possibly the very best bit of this task.

So it's time to organise it again with a new slant, a twist, something to keep it interesting. You don't have to do something every week, but if you can, do. It isn't a challenge to yourself, more like a new hobby, returning to do something you used to enjoy.

Soon it will be Christmas time, traditionally the time of writing out cards to people and wishing them well for the coming year. But how many cards do you receive (or send) with just:

     To Jane,

Merry Christmas

              Love Jill


BORING! Boring to the nth degree.

I don't want to receive these cards, might as well send a communal text message, and to be honest, neither does anyone else. They stick them in the venetians near the Christmas tree, adding to the card numbers, like mini trophies in the who has the most friends competition, but they don't look forward to receiving them like the ones that really have something written in them.

So, it is time to start writing for Christmas. Real writing, with at least a paragraph containing some news, some thoughts, some hopes for the year ahead, a reminder of previous fun times, you get the picture.

It doesn't have to be an official Christmas card. Get the kids to make some, get my kids to make some, for god sake, we have enough glitter in the carpet, we could just roll paper over it for a few days and Ta - daa, sparkly cards.

If you want to get in the spirit of giving early, buy your cards from a charity, many of them rely solely on Christmas cards for revenue.

Alternatively, if you are feeling that you don't have a big Christmas letter writing list, or you don't celebrate Christmas in your neck of the words. The postcard challenge could be your way of getting pen to paper and tasting the back of a stamp once more.

If you are a charity, a NFP or a crafty type that is selling cards, let  me know, I might be able to add you to a link list to inspire all the writers out there.

You don't need to have a blog to join in, just leave a comment if you're on your way to the stationery drawer at your place (hope you have less glitter and worn out texta's in yours than we do).


The image here includes cards from Poss and Wom, you can buy them on Made it

The power of paper with ink

A few weeks into the challenge of writing letters and there are some interesting and surprising results.

I have been writing and posting and receiving not just return mail, but texts and calls to follow up the arrival of what I have sent.

There are a few others that put their hand up to take a trip along the paper trail and they seem to have gone in all sorts of directions.

KerriBennett is contemplating Gen Z missing out on the fun and benefits of the handwritten diary.

pottymouthmama has taken things to extremes and is going for 30 thank-you cards in 30 days.

Melbourne Mumma did it all in one hit, then also moved on to getting a whole new desk to type (and hopefully write) at.

missea has a lovely post about her Mum, who sadly died when missea was a small child. She was given a collection of letters that her Mum had written which is a reminder of how letters can stay around forever, while a facebook post barely lasts a day. The letters are a link to a Mum who died way too early.

While over at Writing Out Loud, I am not sure if there is really time to write letters, with Megan heading off to the writers festival, reviewing books and keeping up her blog.

A few weeks left to go, write along if you feel like it.

Just in: Over at wouldn't it be loverly things are also on track!

Flat Stanley joins the challenge

Well it seems that the creche is getting into the handwriting theme right now too. Today when I picked Popps up (rather late, she was one of the last five there) we had Flat Stanley to bring home too. Flat Stanley was attached to a note for parents.

The children had to decorate Flat Stanley, but ours had a few lines of purple pencil and that was it, I asked what happened to make him the most boring little Flat Stanley possible, Popps let me know that she was too busy being the helper, pushing the food trolley back to the kitchen. So the most boring Flat Stanley ever has to be sent with a letter, by post, to someone else. To someone who will send him back with a letter and a photo of where boring ol' Flat Stanley has got to. Over dinner we discussed who we could send him too.

Popps: "Actually, I want to keep him, I don't want to give him away"

Me: " You'll get him back, he's just going on a holiday, and whoever you send him too will let you know what he gets up to."

Popps: "hmmm, maybe my cousin, and my friend from kinder, and my Granny, and my friend in Geelong."

Me: " Mmm, you only have one boring ol' Stanley."

Popps: "Yes, that's why I want to keep him."

For anyone looking for a project to help children understand about writing letters, the Flat Stanley Project is a fun way to get started. It is based around the children's book Flat Stanley, by Jeff Brown, "Stanley Lambchop is a normal boy who finds himself flattened by a bulletin board, but that doesn't stop his adventures. He is sent through the mail to places all around the world, where friends and family take him on trips, see sights, and increase the knowledge of the world of not only Stanley but also anyone reading the book."

While I get writing on my letters this weekend, Popps will be able to get working on her own writing project. Can't wait to see where boring ol' Stanley ends up.

Due to Popular demand, here is the boring ol' Flat Stanley,

Boring Ol' Flat Stanley

Stanley starts to get some colour