Nearly ten things NOT to buy the under threes

We all have items we have purchased, received or borrowed for the toddler that didnt work out to be all they should.

 

So to help everyone out here is my list of things not to buy.

First up, those lovely soaps that smell yummy and look exactly like a fruit, a doughnut or cake. They are so good that they will be licked, chewed and swallowed in moments.

Closely followed by bath crayons, forget what the packaging says, they DO NOT easily wash off. They require much domestos and scrubbing...before you even get to the tiles and bath.

Rollerskates. Even if they have Dora on them.

 

 

 

Crayola grip hold Tadoodles, they will not teach a child to hold a pencil, they won't even be able to be held by a toddler. They will easily have the ink suckered right out of them and your child will end up looking like you dipped them head first into a bucket of paint.

 

 

More like Cranky Clairey by the end of it.

 

 

Steve Parish story books. These are the dullest books to read to toddlers. Same image every page pretty much and as a double whammy, boring stories too. Parish is a great photographer, end of boring story!

A 500 piece jigsaw. The child will not sit and watch and look for the edges. They will throw it around, hide the pieces, stand on what you have done already and wonder why you are not playing with them.

 

A real golf club, even a junior size one, no Mr H, your daughters are not to be trained to play golf to fund your retirement.

 

A real cricket ball. It will hurt, but not the child. Your windows, your bodily parts, your walls, your renovation budget.

 

A real china tea set, handed down from Great Granny. It shall not be handed down again.

 

I cant think of number ten, help me out, what have you bought, received or gifted a small child that just worked out all wrong?